Melting Frozen Emotion with Family Constellations

While capturing a moment in time in a photo can be precious, some things are best given free rein! Although many people are confronted by or feel uncomfortable connecting with their feelings, in life, it is generally not the felt experience that does the ‘damage’, but rather the frozen emotion that not only paralyses the person themselves and instils fear among others but is at the heart of so many of our relationship difficulties.

For we know that eventually, that feeling is either going to explode in anger, violence or abuse, or implode, creating anxiety, depression or physical illness. It is when we are disconnected from our feelings, the very thing that makes us human, that we forget who we are and create havoc for ourselves and those around us.

When we do a Constellation we are putting into motion the energy (e-motion) that has previously been trapped which has caused us to feel blocked, stuck, powerless and unable to change the patterns we keep repeating. And this is how we (mostly unconsciously) sabotage our happiness, our success and our lives! When the energy is released through feeling it, it is transformed and frees us up to be more productive, creative, present.

Sometimes the feelings may be very powerful and at others, they can be incredibly subtle. Ultimately, in contrast to the earlier cathartic work I too once facilitated for my Clients, this aims to bring people to a place where there is no screaming or shouting or crying, no need for a ‘cricket bat’, (which BTW I never used) but a simple expression of the truth; the acceptance of what is so, without judgement or emotion.

This is when we know that the energy has shifted and we are now free to experience what Petrea King refers to as being ‘emotionally up-to-date’. To witness this and the results it produces in so short a time with such long-term results is a profound experience and sacred privilege!

There are many experiences that can cause us to shut down or disconnect from our feelings, which feel life-threatening at the time and may threaten our actual or perceived survival. What we have discovered through Family Constellations is that the source of our frozen emotion often belongs to a previous generation/s with an ancestor traumatised by the effects of war or other traumatic events, who was unable to process their feelings because they were too overwhelming and the prevailing attitude of the time was to ‘tough it out’, ‘keep a stiff upper lip’, or be stoic and not let others know the pain they were in.

Even though we are still subjected to crimes against humanity, our ancestors were not blessed with access to the awareness and services we have today and we only have to listen to the brave men and women who lived through those times speak about their experience to see the burden they have carried. When we connect with the energy of that person/s through a Constellation and ‘make right’ what was wrong – generally by little more than acknowledging their pain and suffering and honouring their sacrifice – then we restore balance and shift the energy and the choices not only for our ancestors, but also for ourselves and our children.

This is how we make the unconscious, conscious, how we dissolve the ice-floes of the past and are restored to our humanity. It is this experience that I refer to as one of the ‘Miracles of Love’ that a Constellation is.


‘… I feel softer, a deeper connection with self and definitely a deeper connection to humanity.’

Gold Coast Workshop


Want to know more or how I could assist you? Then contact me to book a free 20-minute chat.

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Thanks for sharing!


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